Joel at 58

Fifty-eight birthdays

But, actually: one

This is the only one

That exists

The others have passed

Or have not yet come

And so, this is the only one

That matters

The first one

We celebrate together

Sometimes it seems

So strange

How we found each other

And we are still

Getting to know us

But it is my privilege

To see what is really

Back there

Past the big muscles

And the bigger laugh

The beautiful voice

The handsome face

Behind what you

Show everyone else

It is real

And messy

And true

But also –

Beautiful

And there is weakness

And softness

Love

Pain

Sadness

And fear

But you are wrong

Wrong

If you think

That is it -

That

That is all

There is

Because I have seen

More

Beneath the softness

That hides

Behind your mask

Deep in the middle

In the quiet

In the dark

There is something else

You

The real you

Curled like

A bird

Inside an egg

Sitting like

A prisoner

In solitary

Quietly ticking like

A clock

Waiting

Waiting

And

I see you, in there

I see you